but what if the coffee gets spilled?!?!

too funny for words. a must read.

i am sitting here laughing like a blithering idiot. this one is really funny too.

it's definitely a hall-of-fame kind of site.

i am sending you this email to make you smile when you get up.

very early.

while i am still asleep.

fast asleep.

snoring like a baby and also making wee little bubbles.

i am in my soft warm bed.

you are awake.

i love you.

[no, i'm not kidding -- i sent it just now.]

this really not random blog of the day gets fame and fortune by commenting on random blog posts. what a nifty way to achieve status and links: sea of humanity

sure makes my job easier, you filthy filthy whores.

sometimes i wonder if children ever see these things.

so i've had 14 visits referred from http://blog.johnkerry.com.

since i am clearly not linked on the front page, i can only conclude that i must be popping a few hits from their statistics page, whatever it is.

o wait, i see some failed sort of kerry blogosphere thingy. guess they decided they didn't really want to collate this kind of crap on their own site after all.

it gave me a good laugh :)

do i even need to say anything about how wrong this is?

okay, i didn't really. but if i did, i would buy him these.

mr. p, you are a naughty boy!

arnie wants a smoking plaza where he can chill with the big boys and a fancy cigar.

maybe little guys in carts can sell scotch. discreet men in trenchcoats can offer choice havanas.

or they could just let people smoke in bars.

umm, today's adventure: (this must be) pop!

an entire blog devoted to justin timberlake.

i am absolutely incredulous, yet strangely drawn.

okay, i think it's supposed to be about pop culture, but the whole thing happens to be about justin. i don't know. i don't think i really want to know.

thank god you left for the night and i won't see you for another couple of days. i was growing increasingly homicidal due to your reticence learning the art of dishwashing [the current record is three weeks, people]. you however seem to be quite skilled at eating all of my food (and burning it to my pots and not washing them), thus necessitating several trips to the grocery store each week. moreover, you hog my tv and you don't even pay for the freaking cable bill. plus, the incessant rearranging of my personal belongings is becoming too much to bear (not to mention hiding my things located in the common spaces in YOUR closet). and (dare i say it?) you drink too much [a bottle of wine every night must get a little old, not to mention probably hard on your intestines]. and my friends & i despise it when you pry yourself from your "adultfriendfinder" conversations to bother us, especially when you pretend that you don't understand a single iota of a single premise of "survivor" (duh - they vote people off). that might be better than the porn soundtrack that seems to continuously emanate from your room.

thankfully, you have found a more interesting task than the ones listed above. i'll let you off the hook -- but just for tonight.

love,
alice

disney to acquire my precious little muppets.

i don't want kermie to be all disneyfied!

should you ever watch "my boss's daughter." it is actually unwatchable.

i curse my friends who thought it would be a good idea to put it into the movie queue.